Birthday Thoughts - Blessings or Rewards?

Birthday once again

September is birthday month for me – the time of the year to look back at my journey so far and to look forward to what's ahead.

My  personal baker - Marie!

Blessings

I'm still happily married to my wife, Marie, of 14 years. We have 4 healthy, handsome boys. I still have friends from my school days and have gained new friends along the way. I have a pretty respectable job which I enjoy (most days) and work hard at. I have a roof over my family's head and we have enough for a comfortable life. I'm currently enrolled in a Masters program which I enjoy. By anyone’s standards I suppose I've done well in life so far. Generally I do have a positive outlook. Yet, I find lurking in the recesses of my mind feelings of discontent that are not of God.

Discontentment

These feelings surface in very ordinary, daily scenarios. When I drive into my workplace car park in my cute little Kia Picanto and come face-to-face with the Lexuses, Mercedes, BMWs and even the occasional Ferrari, the ill winds of discontent blow through my mind. I try to be ‘holier-than-thou’ by telling myself that I chose the right thing – to have kids instead of luxury cars. At the end of my life, my kids will appreciate me more than any car ever will. Then the next question arises ‘Why do I not earn enough to afford both – kids and luxury cars?’ Some of my contemporaries have clearly done well enough to do so. Why did God not bless me so? Was I doing something wrong?

Yummy Birthday Cake!

By God's Grace

This month as I reflect on my life, God wanted me to learn this statement – “By God’s Grace, what I have and where I am are exactly what God wants me to have and to be”.

“By God's grace" sounds humble and pious but it is false humility unless I really believe it. Many times when I said "It's by God's grace..." what I actually meant was that I was good and made good choices. Therefore I deserved these good things that I was blessed with. So whenever I felt that others had ‘more’ or ‘better’ things than me, the feelings of discontent would come again.

Take the example of the cars again - if I had a Porsche and someone said, "Wah, super car!" I would say "by God's grace - He blessed me with this car" (meaning I worked hard and deserved this car). But if someone said "Wah, super car!" to my Kia Picanto (trust me, no one has ever said that), I would say "Yeah, it was cheap and I grabbed it" (meaning actually I deserved better).

Blessings or Rewards?
Many people say “I don’t want children because they affect my lifestyle and I cannot afford them.” If we are convinced that children are God’s blessings to us, then what we’re saying would be “I don’t want God’s blessings because they affect my lifestyle and I cannot afford 

Family Birthday Dinner

them.” We can’t receive and enjoy God’s blessings when we think of them as rewards that we deserve because of our hard work and good behaviour. Even though Marie and I have been blessed four times by God, there are many, many days when the boys make us wonder “Why God? Why did you have to give us these blessings? Wouldn’t a round-the-world trip for two have been better a better reward?” Seeing the boys as blessings is a lesson that Marie and I have to learn over and over again.

Good Choices & Control

Also, the premise that I could make good choices all on my own is utterly wrong. Left to my own devices and without God’s guidance, I would have made all the wrong choices in life. I sometimes wonder what life would be like if I hadn’t married Marie. She still chides me for making her wait for such a long time before I asked her to be my steady girlfriend. Somehow whenever she wanted to give up on me, we would meet up unexpectedly and give her hope again (OK, as promised, this is a story that I shall tell soon). Say what you will, there is only one reason for that – God was maneuvering us together in the background.

The stakes keep getting bigger and bigger as I got older as well. As I climbed higher in the career ladder, gained more social and professional credibility, had more bills and loans to pay for, had more people dependent on me, life got more and more complex; and less and less under my control. I could strain with all my might and work myself to exhaustion, yet I could not promise you what will happen tomorrow. There is only one who can promise this and that is God. It is good to know that the One who controls the universe also has my best interest in His heart.

Another celebration - Waffle and Ice Cream

Jesus - He took our pain

So “By God’s Grace, what I have and where I am are exactly what God wants me to have and to be” is not only a statement that reminds me to be humble and also gives me peace that He has everything under control.

What is more amazing is that as flawed, fallible people, God’s Grace is big enough to accommodate even our wrongs and bad choices. We do not have to earn God’s good graces to receive His blessings. His Grace even takes into account our failures and provides for that.

The other day when I turned on my mobile phone Bible app, it displayed the verses for the day: Isaiah 53: 3-5.

He was despised and rejected—
    a man of sorrows, acquainted with deepest grief.
We turned our backs on him and looked the other way.
    He was despised, and we did not care.

⁴ Yet it was our weaknesses he carried;
    it was our sorrows that weighed him down.
And we thought his troubles were a punishment from God,
    a punishment for his own sins!
⁵ But he was pierced for our rebellion,
    crushed for our sins.
He was beaten so we could be whole.
    He was whipped so we could be healed.

                        New Living Translation (through www.biblegateway.com)

Honestly I was in no mood that day to read about Jesus getting beaten up. Who wants to start the day with such morbid thoughts? I wanted to go the book of ‘Romans’ to receive God’s Words of Grace for the day but the phone insisted on displaying Isaiah 53 in spite of my attempts. God wanted me to know that the very Grace I wanted from Him was possible only because His punishments for me were meted out to Jesus instead. And no matter how terrible I think my life is; yes, there is someone else who life was worse than mine. God put upon Jesus the terrible things that should have happened to me so that He could bless me with the good things. No matter how wearisome and burdensome I feel, I need to remember that what could have been worse in my life did not happen to me because it was hung there on the cross with Jesus.

Peace

This is what makes it worth it!

The other day in church, I had been tending to Samuel for what felt like an eternity during service. He had been climbing up and down and had not stayed still even for a brief moment. I was sweating from carrying him and running after him. For a break, I carried him out of the sanctuary onto the third floor, hoping that he would settle down and sleep. As I looked downstairs to the ground floor, I saw a super cool looking Mercedes drive into the car park. I had this strange feeling all of a sudden. For once I didn’t feel envious of the guy with the Mercedes. I felt a sense of thankfulness for the both of us – he with his car and me with my wriggly kid. If I believed that we were both blessed with exactly what God wanted us to have then I should be happy for both of us; and I was! It was a strange feeling that I was not used to but for once the spirit of envy was stilled; and it felt good (… Samuel fell asleep soon after that too J).

Post Note:

I felt that I needed to qualify a few statements in this blog:

1. The blog is talking about contentment with my day to day living. There is such a thing as holy discontent with where we are Spiritually. I believe when we don’t get caught up with discontentment in material matters that we feel spiritual discontentment and yearn for more of God. There is great danger in spiritual stagnation masquerading as contentment.

2. The statements about children only apply if you are clear that God specifically wants to bless you with children. God blesses each one of us with different things. There is no one size fits all. The danger for those of us who have children is when we display them as medals of valour and make those who don’t have children feel guilty.

3. A friend said after listening to me compare my Picanto to a Porsche once again, “Are you sure you’re a car person? You don’t really look like one.” Guilty as charged but you understand why I chose this illustration, yes? It’s a guy thing.

Education - Tool or Master?

It's that time of the year again!
April-May and September-October - for those of who who have school-going children (and for those of you who have gone through the system yourselves), these months spell school exams. These are months of long schoolwork hours, sweat, tears and increased stress and tension all around.

Birthday celebration before school. Best way to start a school day!

As I write this blog on a Sunday, I have just spent the afternoon going through a grueling Science revision session with one of my sons. It started out with lots of scolding and it could have degenerated into a protracted scolding session but thankfully we found constructive ways to learn a lot of information in a very short time. 


Resisting the System
Marie and I have always tried to resist the pressures in the education system that are applied on the children (and the parents too!). When the boys started school, we congratulated ourselves that we didn't put them through private tuition.  We didn't drive them from enrichment class to enrichment class; certainly not on weekends. We wanted Sundays to be the Lord's rest day and not have the boys do any work. We said schooling was about the joy of learning, not about scoring marks.

Well, that was easy when the boys were younger. Once the first boy hit Primary 4, all that went out of the window; and progressively more so with the rest of the boys. The pressure to make sure our boys did well in school increased year on year the nearer they got to the PSLE (Primary School Leaving Examination). The fear that our children would not do well enough in the exams and derail their future prematurely with just one misstep drove us to do what we said we wouldn't. These days, I spend Saturdays waiting in McDonald's for one of the boys to finish Science tuition at a learning centre while I personally tutor another one of them. On Sundays, we rush back from church in time for Chinese Tuition. There was just no other day in the week to squeeze it in. 




Letter to the Forum Page

Recently my brother-in-law, whom I consider to be extremely brilliant and successful in his career, wrote to give feedback on our education system in one of our local newspaper discussion page. I think he managed to capture very succinctly the frustrations parents have with the education system.

First day in school!

I give a short quote from his letter  : "As a product of the system in the '80s and now a father of two children in lower primary, I fear that the system has become one of irrelevant, unrealistic standards.

And I come from the perspective of someone who excelled within the old system, yet always questioned the relevance of the education content to real-world settings. Sadly, the situation has gotten worse.

It is no longer a matter of excelling in class; to simply pass maths today, it is mandatory to have tuition to fill the gaps that teachers sometimes struggle to fill. If so many pupils require tuition, it means our education system has failed in its basic goal of imparting the correct skill sets."
(You can read the full letter here: TODAYonline | Voices | Standards are unrealistic)

What is a Christian Response?

I have often asked myself "What should my response be as a Christian, to the pressures of our local education system?" If Christians are called to be the aroma of Christ (2 Corinthians 2:14) in this world that does not know God, then surely our knowing Him would help us have a different response. I wish I could show a greater degree of peace regarding my children's future. The Bible says nothing (even bad results!) can ever separate us from the love of God in Christ Jesus (Romans 8:29).

As far as I can see, Christian parents are just as likely to send our children for tuition and enrichment classes as non-Christian parents. Nothing wrong with that but why do we do that? Is it to enhance our childrens' education or is it driven by anxiety and fear? If we do it for their education, do we do it to the extent that they have no time for play? Studies have shown repeatedly how crucial play is to a child's emotional well being. Yet we think it is ok to sacrifice that for one more hour of studies, hoping that will bring better results and an assurance of a better future (and when I say we, I also mean me).

The Lingering Effects of the System

Those school days when I still had hair!

This question is also important to me not just as a concerned parent but now that I am starting my Masters course pre-work, I can already feel some of my old 'ghosts' coming back to haunt me. 


I was not very fun as a kid. I was one of those who focused a lot of my energy on academic perfection. Doing well in exams was more or less the one main goal in my life. I sacrificed family holidays, leisure pursuits, disciplined myself to study every night and weekends. My wife, Marie had experienced firsthand my stress levels when I was taking exams as an adult some years back. She told me that it was no fun being with me during those times.


Having gone through the system, I find the lingering effects of the system in my life. There certainly is pride in there. I thought myself superior than others just because I scored better marks. I was unforgiving of myself for each mistake I made. As a working adult, I am more demanding and critical of people than I should be. I feel insecure when I do not perform well at work - I think people will not like me because I've made a mistake or let something slip.

Education - Tool or Master?

I believe the answer to the question of how Christians should respond differently is found in Matthew 22:15 - 22. In this passage, the religious leaders asked Jesus if they should pay taxes i.e. to obey human government and institutions. They were trying to trap Jesus to see if he would renounce tax paying, thereby calling for a revolt against human authority and government. Jesus' answer was sublime - “Give to Caesar what is Caesar’s, and to God what is God’s.” 

So with regards to our education system, what DO we give to 'Caesar'?

Proud achievements!

As a tool, I think our education system is pretty sharp.  Our education system does a fairly good job to ensure that our children are suitably educated not just for our local setting but also the international arena. Some countries of the world and even some cities in the US may not be able to claim that. I believe we should, and also expect out children to, render a reasonable amount of hard work. For whatever ill effects the education system has had on me, the skills, discipline and knowledge that I have learnt through my schooling years are still of good value to me now as an adult. Where effort is put in, there are valuable rewards from our education system.


What we do not render to 'Caesar' and only to God is our whole lives and our goals. The Bible tells us to love our God with "all our heart and our soul and our minds". I think for me, it takes great effort to constantly check myself from crossing that line from seeing education as a tool to education being my Master. It is when we see education as a Master that we are driven by fear and guilt. The pressures to bow down to it are relentless.  Education can be a demanding and unforgiving task master in Singapore. It seems like it will only be pleased with nothing but perfect scores.


We have to reject the education system as our Master and turn to God instead who is loving, gracious and merciful. When I pray to God to help me study harder, get better results, in the name of doing 'good' work for God. Am I really saying that or am I actually asking God to help me meet the demands of my Education Master? God will not do that.

By Prayer and supplication ... and then Peace

A case in point - when I was studying for my 'O' levels exam, I listened to a sermon on Philippians 4: 6-7. The preacher said that we should honestly tell God whatever we wanted in our hearts. He may not give us what we want but He will give us peace. 


So I had been studying really hard and I thought I deserved the marks. So I asked God "Promise me that You will give me 8 A1s" - an A1 for every subject I was studying. I can still remember it as if it just happened. It was night time and I was in my room. Immediately I heard a clear voice say in my head "Why do you need that (i.e. 8 A1s) when you have Me?" That was it. God made it clear to me that He would not give me what I asked for because I was building my security in that instead of Him. Yet, those words from God gave me a peace. The funny thing was that from the 'O' levels onward, I've never gotten a perfect score for any of my exams. There would always be one subject where the result sort of went 'wonky' and I missed my expected marks. Each time I looked at the result slip, I would hear God remind me "You don't need that, you have Me." God has held true to this promise all these years.

Learning Grace and Mercy & Showing a better way
In asking us to continue to pay taxes to Caesar, Jesus is asking us to continue to be part of and to engage the human systems in our societies. As Christians, we should continue to call out for changes to the system to better reflect the love and grace of God. We should try more to accommodate those who are not able to show 'A' grades despite their best efforts. God's heart goes out to those who are weak, poor, brokenhearted, undefended. Systems that honour God must behave in the same way as well.

I want to be just like my big brother!

If I am going to reflect more of God to my kids, I think I would say more frequently "It's OK, let's just try again." I would give them more hugs instead of scolding. I would help them more to learn and understand instead of expecting them to get it right on their own by studying harder and longer.


We get flustered, angry, agitated, anxious, fearful when we think the education system will take care of us. God asks us to engage the system but He never asks us to depend on the system to take care of us or our children. It is His desire to take care of us and He will do that infinitely better than any human system could ever do.

As I was writing this blog, the words from this worship song struck me. Surely we have every reason to be at peace when we trust in our God who is "More Than Amazing".


More Than Amazing by Lincoln Brewster:
You're the one who walked on water
And You calmed the raging seas
You command the highest mountains
To fall upon their knees ....

You are amazing
More than amazing
Forever our God
You're more than enough
You are amazing

Interviews - getting to the heart of the matter

Being Interviewed
I mentioned in my previous blog of my intention to pursue a Masters course. This came with an interview early this month by the school's Admissions Committee. I was a bit nervous because it's been a while since I've been interviewed but the interviewers were incredibly kind and patient, especially with the interview conducted via Skype. At times I could see the interviewers having a quizzical look - I spoke too fast and said too much. However, I'm glad to announce that they've accepted me into the course. They also gave such nice comments about my performance.

Would the boys follow my profession?

Being an Interviewer
So in a way, I've come round a full circle. A few months ago I received an e-mail inviting me to interview candidates seeking admission to a local university faculty. I said 'yes' and spent 2 days doing that this month. It chewed big chunks out of my schedule and gave my secretary nightmares but I'm really glad I did it.

Stories!
What I enjoyed about the sessions were the stories that I got to hear. These eager young men and women came to convince us of their achievements, commitment and sincerity to pursue this profession. They spoke of their families, friends, life in school and the military (National Service). Many were leaders in social and volunteer groups. Some were accomplished athletes, artists or musicians. We were told of their role models and teachers who nurtured them. They described the joys of life and even the sorrows of witnessing death.

For us interviewers, what the candidate said was as important as what he / she was really saying and how he / she said it. Certainly some degree of preparation was helpful but over-preparation stuck out like a sore thumb. Many candidates rattled off a litany of standard 'I'm here to change the world, heal the sick, help the poor' statements. We probed hard to find the genuine candidates.

Doors may close but is this the only one?
Simple maths would show that when there are more applicants than places, then not every applicant can be accepted. I felt burdened for the candidates that spoke as if their entire lives had been a series of decisions and actions leading to this one interview. As I explained to some of them, a world of options was opened to them with their achievements. To me, the interviews were really more like career guidance to assess if they had a long term fit with the profession; rather than tests to be passed or failed. Not being accepted to the faculty was not a closed door but an open door to the many other options available to them.

I'm good, aren't I?
I don't think many of the candidates bought that. The truth is that everyone of us when we're being assessed, want to be found acceptable, even excellent. As a perfectionist, I run a daily, ongoing interview in my mind - 'Why did you do that?', 'Why did you say that?', 'What do you think they would think of you?', 'Is this your best attempt or could you have done better?', 'What did you write in that email? Why didn't he respond to it?'. More often than not, I find myself wanting in these internal interviews. Some days the interviews are so loud and so persistent in my mind I can only turn to God and ask to know that in His grace I am acceptable, even loved in my imperfections.

Would they want to?

I wish I could keep all these thoughts within myself but inadvertently they leak out. At work, my bosses are really winsome people but I just cannot fully relax in their presence because of this monologue in my head. I think my bosses find me wanting so I find myself wanting (actually from my annual reports, they're quite happy with my work; which makes my internal monologue even sadder, doesn't it?). I am tense, always ready to jump to my own defense.

One of my favourite questions at the interview sessions (and I'll tell this to you because no candidate will actively prepare for it) is "Tell me about a time when you met with failure and how you handled it". Invariably, this question would be met with a stunned look and a long pause. These high performing young men and women came brimming with tales of success and did not expect to be asked about their failures. I guess some degree of awareness that life will not always be smooth sailing is useful. I remember my first year university exam results - not having any 'A's in the results slips and not being anywhere near the top of the class was a big shocker to me. The rest of my university days were to prove that I was a competent student but no where near outstanding amongst a cohort of brilliant contemporaries.This was a fact of life I had to learn to accept.

Jesus does interviews completely different
If there's anything I'm learning from these interviews, it's that I need to learn more of grace then of competence. God drew me to a passage in the Bible that actually recorded an interview. This one was conducted for a man who had failed miserably. In John 21, Jesus appeared to Peter and some other disciples. Peter had sworn that he would remain faithful to Jesus at all costs. At the crucial moment of Jesus' trial and crucifixion, the rooster had crowed as Jesus had predicted, signaling the three times Peter had denied Jesus publicly. He broke down in tears of regret and grief when he realised his own failure.

There's much that I can learn from Jesus. He knows that broken people need not be broken any further but instead need to be loved.. Yet, not a soft, cottony wooly illusion of love but a tough love - the real stuff. The type of real, deep love that we all want to be loved with.

Jesus appeared by a beach, beside a crackling fire, cooking fish and bread (Jesus cooked! How amazing!). As mothers know, there is nothing like a well-cooked meal to create a sense of warmth and security. Jesus must have known that would draw Peter in. Repair of a life always begins with the willingness for one to open his heart.

That does not exclude tough Questions!
But Jesus did not shy away from asking Peter the tough questions. Three times he asked: “Simon son of John, do you love me more than these?”, “Simon son of John, do you love me?”, “Simon son of John, do you love me?” He probed to find out the real answer, each of these questions pierced deep into Peter's heart and caused him pain.


 John 17:3 "The third time he said to him, “Simon son of John, do you love me?”. Peter was hurt because Jesus asked him the third time, “Do you love me?” He said, “Lord, you know all things; you know that I love you.” 


He did this more for Peter's sake because He already knew what was in Peter's heart. It was Peter who needed to have an honest, clear understanding of the secrets in his own heart - the weakness, the lack of reliability hiding in there.


Trust him with your life

I can be anything God wants me to be!

The best thing one can do to repair a broken  man is to entrust him with what is most important to you. To each of Peter's answers, Jesus entrusted him with his sheep (the church). Not once was there recrimination for the betrayal by Peter at those crucial moments. Instead Jesus gave Peter the chance to try again. 


“Feed my lambs.”, “Take care of my sheep.”,  Jesus said, “Feed my sheep.

As I write this, God is also asking me "Chi Hong, do you love me more than these?". I think it will take me time to find the real answer and God will not stop till I know what that answer is. He already knows me and I am thankful that whatever answer I eventually give, God will still trust me with His work. Ultimately what we all want is to know we are loved and trusted even when we are terribly flawed - in God we will find that to be true.

Post Script:
This week, I conducted orientation for a bunch of new recruits who have finished their university learning and taking their first steps into the profession. I am glad to report that most of them are still bright eyed and enthusiastic.When someone asked "Do you think that you can still change the world?", I am glad that at least one young man said "Yes!" in a very loud voice. It seems the interviewers five years ago had chosen right. There is hope yet :)

This is a video by a couple of guys called the Skit Guys. I love them - they're funny, they like to laugh and in the process, they also teach God's truth. You can find more of their skits at http://skitguys.com/


Here, they re-enact Jesus' conversation with Peter, well, it's terribly Americanized but still a picture is worth a thousand words I suppose.

                     

Is Green Mean?

Judging Books by Their Covers

I had heard that the musical production "Wicked" was good. We had to plan way in advance and thanks to my sister who kindly agreed to baby-sit the boys, we made it to the show before its run in Singapore ended.

I like the "Wicked" story very much. As you may be aware, it is a parallel story to the book "The Wonderful Wizard of Oz" by L. Frank Baum. The premise of the musical, as with the original story, is that we tend to judge others simply by their appearance. Just because someone is green, dresses in black and puts on a pointy hat - we think that she is evil. In contrast, the blond, pretty one, dressed in every girls' dream of a fairy ball gown - she's good. As one of the characters said, it's not a matter of what you are, it's what people you are that matters. This is the cause of many problems in our lives.

Put some powder on that green?

I thought one of the brilliant situations in the musical was working out how to make over a witch? A stylist's nightmare for sure, but if the problem is window dressing then let's put up a better one. Problem solved, right?

Last week a local newspaper reported that our nation has become the ‘OCD’ (Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder) Capital of the world. 1 in 30 people of our local population has OCD as compared to 1 in 40 in the U.S. OCD is an anxiety disorder that causes sufferers to have an uncontrollable compulsion to perform ritualistic and repetitive action like washing or checking (watch the YouTube Video – Jack Nicholson acts it out excellently). A common fear that OCD sufferers have is dirt and they are constantly washing themselves. Many of these people are totally incapacitated by these behaviours to the point that they can’t live normal lives. Sociologists and academics interviewed were of the opinion that the incessant drive in our nation to achieve peak performance and perfection contributes to the high prevalence of this condition here. 


So perhaps window dressing is not such a good solution. In the constant scrutiny that we're under, our minds still see imperfections that are not there and keep driving us subconsciously to clean up or cover up the spots.

Pin on badges to hide the green?

Beyond just trying endlessly to improve ourselves, we strive to window dress better by hanging external accolades, titles, validation to show the world how good we are. There is jubilation when this occurs but crushing defeat when it doesn't. I watched a BBC TV program called ‘Michelin Stars – The Madness of Perfection’. It is a documentary describing the intense pressure in the culinary world for chefs to receive and keep these stars as a nod to their cooking. The chefs both embraced this and vilified it for the intense pressure it put them under. There was an account of a French chef who took his own life at the rumour that he was going to lose his 3-star (world class) status.

My own experience
I re-wrote this blog several times because it just seemed so preachy. I realised that it is so because 1) we all know that we should not judge. I am not writing something new. From the time we're children we've been told that we should not judge others by their appearance; and yet we still do it; and 2) that this message is first and foremost for me. I should look at my own life first before writing this as if it is everyone else's problem but mine.


I know that I am a perfectionist and I judge myself and others more harshly than I need to. Reading my last blog about the lessons I've had to learn in my marriage would have illustrated this.


Just last month at a church-organized silent retreat, God gave me Matthew 8:2-3: A man with leprosy came and knelt before him and said, “Lord, if you are willing, you can make me clean." v2. God reminded me that I was driving myself to exhaustion trying to cover up my spots. The irony was my immediate response to promise God I would do better – more Bible Study, more prayer, more discipline. God said “No! Stop!”. I did not need a self-improvement plan – I needed a God-transformation. Jesus reached out his hand and touched the man. “I am willing,” he said. “Be clean!” Immediately he was cleansed of his leprosy. v3 



Change comes in a different way 

There is a need to break this vicious cycle of "I judge you, you judge me". I believe that in our society's drive to succeed and be perfect, we have placed on ourselves the heavy burden of a critical spirit. Matthew 7; 1-2 says:


 ¹ Do not judge, or you too will be judged. ² For in the same way you judge others, you will be judged, and with the measure you use, it will be measured to you.

I acknowledge that I am in need of such a change. The solution is not to tell myself "Don't do it, Don't do it, it's wrong" because that in itself is a judgment and will only stir up my internal critical spirit to judge others even more.

The characters in the musical also find out that they can't change the external colour of their skin or their own self, even when they use magical powers. The more they try, the worse it gets.

But they do find out that people can change on the inside. When people really care about each other, the good they show each rubs off on the other. The solution, as they learnt, is in relationships. In God I am learning "He who knows me best, loves me most". It is when I realise that my deepest, darkest faults are no longer judged that I can stop judging others.

 Therefore, there is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus, 

Who will bring any charge against those whom God has chosen? It is God who justifies. Who then is the one who condemns? No one. Christ Jesus who died—more than that, who was raised to life—is at the right hand of God and is also interceding for us. Romans 8:1, 33-34

 

I know this in theory now but it will be in living my life that my behaviour will change. As the story in the Wizard of Oz teaches us – the tin man looking for a heart, the lion looking for courage, the scarecrow looking for brains and Dorothy looking for the way home. It is in their journey and adventures on the golden brick road that they learn passion, courage, wisdom and direction. So pray for me that as I journey on my life with God, His grace and mercy will be more and more evident in my life. Amen.


Let not the wise man boast of his wisdom or the strong man boast of his strength or the rich man boast of his riches, but let him who boasts boast about this: that he understands and knows me, that I am the LORD, who exercises kindness, justice and righteousness on earth, for in these I delight, declares the LORD. Jeremiah 9: 23-24

For Good (With Lyrics) - a song about how friends change each other for the better

I've heard it said
that people come into our lives for a reason
Bringing something we must learn 
and we are lead to those who help us most to grow
if we let them and we help them in return
Well i dont know if i believe that's true
But i know i'm who i am today because i knew you.

It well may be that we will never meet again in this lifetime

so let me say before we part

so much of me is made from what i learned from you

You'll be with me like a hand print on my heart

Now whatever way our stories end

I know you have rewritten mine by being my friend

The King's Soap

I wrote this first story sometime in 2007 when I was asked to tell a story for Easter at a Church Sunday School I was teaching in at that time...

Once upon a time, in a land far, far away, there was a King who had to leave on a long journey. He loved the subjects of his Kingdom very much and was concerned that they would not be ready for him when he returned. So he reminded them many times before he left “It is my soap that will wash you clean. Remember that”.

And so the King began his journey and the kingdom waited for His return. While they waited, some people said the King had not really gone away. If you believed in your heart and listened very carefully, you will still hear the King speaking to you. Those who did not believe called this ‘Rubbish!’ and said that the King had left because He did not love them anymore. They said that the King would never return.

The days became weeks, and the weeks months. So the years went by and people went on with their daily lives - going to school, working, going out, staying in – all the same things that you and I would do.

And then one day – there was a stunning announcement. “The King is coming! The King is coming! Get yourselves ready to meet the king!” The Kingdom was stunned at the news at first but it quickly turned to joy and excitement. People busied themselves cleaning their houses and their shops. Soon beautiful and colourful decorations were put up. Banners were hung that declared “Welcome to the King of kings”

It was during this time of busyness that an old man appeared in the middle of the town. Some said that he looked very much like the King himself but many were too busy to bother. The old man had with him a big pile of bright red soap. To those who would stop and listen he said, “Soap! Soap! Soap to make you clean for the King.”, and for many days He stood there shouting these words as the people hurried by.

He offered the soap to a woman dressed in the most beautiful clothes and jewelry. She turned her nose up at it immediately. “Me? Do I look like I am dirty? Do I need your ugly soap? Look at my beautiful clothes and jewelry. The King is sure to want to meet me the minute He sees me in these.” And she rushed off to buy another beautiful dress – just in case.

Next the old man offered the soap to a man who thought he did everything right. The man asked “What is this?” .“This” said the old man, “is soap made from the very blood of my own son. Only this will make you clean for the King.” .The man replied “What? Soap from blood? Soap & blood will not make you clean. Bathing in milk everyday is what makes you clean. To be really clean, in fact, you need to bathe in chocolate milk. That is what I do everyday. When the King returns, I am sure he will want to see me because I have done what is right.” And he rushed off to buy another bottle of chocolate milk just in case.

The third person who passed the old man was a rich man who had worked hard all his life. He asked the old man “How much does this soap cost?” “The soap is free!” the old man said. “Free!? Free!!?? Free things are not good,” the rich man said,” I have worked hard all my life to earn lots of money. The King will want to see me once he sees the expensive gifts that I have bought for him.” And he rushed off to buy another expensive present just in case.

Finally, there appeared before the old man a boy and a girl. “Sir,” they said, “we are poor and have nothing to offer; and we are dirty. We will not be fit to meet the King unless we wash ourselves. We beg you for a small bit of your soap.” And the old man looked upon them and loved them dearly. He said “My dear children, the soap is free – as you have asked, take it and use it and you will be ready for the King.” With great joy the children received their gifts and washed themselves clean; and not only the two children but all others who saw that they had nothing to offer the King, received the soap with gladness and washed themselves clean.

 Amidst the flurry of activities, the old man suddenly shouted loudly “Stop! It is finished! I have returned!” Before the eyes of all the people he disappeared and before them stood the King. At once, every one bowed down on their knees and worshipped the King.

And the King asked “Who is fit to come live with me in the castle?”

The woman, the “right” man and the rich man all shouted “Me! Me! I am the one who is fit – I have the beautiful clothes, I have done the right things, I have the money and the expensive gifts.”

And the King said “Fools! These will not make you fit for me. Have I not said before I left? It is only soap that will make you clean. It is those who have washed with soap that are fit to come with me.”

He looked kindly upon those who had used the soap and He opened his arms to them “These are the ones who are fit.”. With great joy, they went with Him and lived with Him in His Castle happily ever after.

 The End

For God so loved the world that He gave His one and only son that whoever believes in Him shall not perish but have eternal life. John 3:16